How to Create a Vision for Your Family

We are often asked? How do we develop a vision for our family? As believers we are not left to wander without direction. God’s word is very clear on the subject. In Mathew 6:33 the scripture reads; But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness: and all these things shall be added unto you. In James 1:5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
The first step in developing a family vision is to seek the Lord with all your heart. We then know that he will give us the needed wisdom to proceed in His path. Often times it becomes necessary to have our minds renewed before we are able to receive what God would have for us. It is much like the parable of the new wine that is being placed in an old wineskin. We need to have our minds renewed to receive the new word God is speaking to us.
When we began our journey of faith in the area of homeschooling our children, it became very evident that we had a very worldly mindset of education. It was through much prayer and soul searching that God brought us out on the other end. Here is a little testimony of our path to a lifestyle of learning.

Mike and I were married in 1988. At the time of our marriage I had an older son who was 6. He was in kindergarten. He would spend every weekend at his fathers. His father was not a believer and between his weekends away and weekday s at school we began to see we had very little influence over his life. We were seeking the Lord with our whole heart and felt the Lord speak to us to home school him. I began the process of homeschooling him for several years. I basically modeled his education after the school system and taught Bible and character building. After several years I was becoming burnt out. I had 3 babies and a teen at home. The Lord was speaking to me regarding my methods of education. I read the scripture that said ,“my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” There was nothing easy about what I was doing. Not only that, I began to see rebellion in my sons heart. I came to the place where I thought, “why am I knocking myself out to get the same results as everyone else?” It was at that point I surrendered my understanding for Gods. I simply told God, “unless you show me what to do, I am not doing anything.” That was the day I traded my old wineskin for new.
The Lord began to reveal to me my motives for homeschooling the way I was.
Motive #1 Fear of man, the Lord revealed to me that I had a fear of man. That I feared what man would do to me more than I feared God.
Motive#2 Pride, I wanted everyone to look at me and see that I did a good job. I wanted others to see how well behaved and schooled my children were.
I was totally broken because I realized my motives were not based on God and the end results were showing up in rebellion against me. Ephesians 6:4 and, ye fathers , provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
I immediately went to my son and repented. We wept and sought forgiveness together. We then began to pray about what God would have him to be learning during this season of his life. He became so excited.
The subject he wanted to learn about was Taxidermy. We went to the library and checked out some books and began to read and study the information. He was so excited. He was reading books far higher in grade level. His reading improved and so did his cooperation with his education. For the first time in years he was excited about learning. We set apart a small amount of time to do his, “table time” as we called it. This basically was his math. His writing and reading were done studying bird books and making journals about different bird species. During this time his reading increased by 3 grade levels. It had become evident that Gods ways are not mans, and from first hand experience I can tell you his ways are way more efficient.
I remember on one occasion my son decided to taxidermy a blue bird. With book in hand we set out to stuff a bird on the kitchen table. Before we began we prayed together that God would give us wisdom and diligence, which were two characteristics we did not posses very much of at the time. About halfway through the project we hit a snag as he was trying to pull the head of the bird over the skull. The skin had shrunk and we didn’t know what to do. My son became very upset and began to give up. He said this was a waste of two hours. I told him that we were going to pray and ask again for wisdom and that we were going to see what God showed us. So we prayed and then he said, “well I think I can cut it under the neck and sow it up underneath.” I said OK lets try that, we did this and it worked. We turned the next page and it read,” If the skin shrinks cut underneath and sow from the inside.” Wow, we got it straight from the wiseth of the wise. This memory of God becoming uniquely involved in my sons education will forever remain a part of his life.
For us, an individual education, that was God designed became a big part of our family vision.

I suggest as you seek the Lord that you began a journal and write down that things the Lord speaks to your heart in regards to your own family.
Another area that God impressed upon us was to create family unity. We began to evaluate every area in our lives to see if our activities were bringing us closer as a family or farther apart. This is an area many people are unwilling to sacrifice for. For us God spoke specifically that HE would bring us family friends. What that meant to us was that we didn’t each have our own individual friends but that God brought families to us that were like minded. This kept our family intact and also became a great source of joy as God united our hearts with His people of differing ages. To this day these relationships are our most valued and we consider them to be our family. It is amazing what happens when you allow God to control every area of your life. My children have friends that are ten years older, the same age, and ten years younger. They are not limited to friendships based on their own age.

Whatever God shows you to be a vision for your family, it is wise to shine the light of the Holy Spirit over every activity to see if your activities line up with your vision. I like to picture a light shining over what I am involved in to see if it is bringing about the desired fruit in my life and my children.